On the Subject of Booty Calls…
Weekends where there’s nothing to do will force you to be creative when it comes to having fun. I’ve never had a booty call in other countries where the culture is (arguably) more open-minded but in my current base of operations, things such as booty calls and one-nights stands are not as common as you would think. Panama has a reputation for being a place where you can get anything as long as you ask the right people, but like many other things that are grossly misunderstood, it doesn’t quite work that way. There are loopholes, yes, but it seems to me that no matter what shortcuts you take there will always be some degree of penance for it; not in the karmic way but in the real world. Society has to balance itself out somehow, I suppose, and something as ultimately miniscule in the worry scale as the “booty call” suffers from it in the most ridiculous of ways.
Panama City is no more a small city than it is a really big town. Everyone is, at the most, three degrees away from knowing each other and keeping a secret hidden is kind of moot if you’re doing whatever it is you want to keep hidden in front of other people. In regards to sex, culturally we’re not as open minded as we would like to be, and it happens often that you meet people who won’t object to you doing objectionable things but they will give you a sappy face or two, behind your back or not. There’s this thing about keeping appearances that trumps everything else that should be important to a person, such as comfort or happiness. Anyway, because of these things the concept of the booty call is not common around these parts, and I think it’s a shame. Sex, as taboo as it might be, is a natural, beautiful thing. Still, it’s been grossly glorified at times: I’m sure it’s happened to you that due to a series of unrelated events you end up sleeping (or in some cases, just making out) with someone and suddenly you’ve earned yourself a relationship. It’s like you’re back in middle school, with everyone talking about it while you’re not paying attention, too busy being oblivious. I feel silly just writing about it. The fact that grown adults are degrading sexual escapades into some recess time gossip is ridiculous. Still, it happens and you can either play by the rules or get bent.
I’d rather get bent trying to outsmart the rules rather than following them. This leads me to the booty call arena, where anything is possible yet no status quo is ever permanent. In my personal experience it’s easier to have a stripped down, sexual relationship with someone who’s just passing by but that’s obvious enough: there’s an expiration date on the physical proximity, so it’s easier to detach oneself from it. Getting over the fact that people like sex and getting laid, and just like getting a soda it shouldn’t be something that’s wrong to seek, there are further hurdles to jump past. I won’t get into details with my experiences on the subject ‘cuz this ain’t a tell-all, but I can tell you that one-night stands, if they’re left at that, can be very satisfying and help you get the proverbial thumb out of your ass in regards to these things. There is such a thing as sex without affection, and there’s nothing wrong with enjoying it. Now, a booty call implies some degree of frequency, and when you’re in a country where you see everyone over and over all the time, detachment can prove to be quite difficult. I’m sure this is not exclusive to small countries because the concept of people morphing a sexual relationship to a romantic one is universal; still, the chances of that happening in Panama are considerably higher, specially since the people who have been brought up in this culture have it inbred to keep appearances pristine and puritane. Of course, in order to do that, you have to lie.
Lately I feel that asking someone the simple favor of talking to me about a problem they might have with me is a gargantuan task, one that is interpreted as some sort of primal threat that reminds me of a Kaiju battle. It’s ridiculous. I bring this up because it’s usually because of people keeping appearances that they don’t talk about what they don’t like, and when something doesn’t go the way they want it to they explode and act unexpectedly. This is specially true when it comes to sex; since the common zeitgeist is that sex is an intimate act between two (or three, or seven) people, It has been eerily common to find myself in situations where sex and personal feelings do some coupling as well. I don’t know about you, but to me a booty call is finite: both of us are going to use each other to quench a common thirst, we’re attracted to each other, wham bam thank you, ma’am and I’ll call you the next time I feel like wrasslin’. This isn’t a diamond, though; the best thing to do is to be honest, speak what’s on your mind and the fun will stretch as much as possible. Like most things, it’s a matter of keeping your head on right and all the cards on the table.
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