Panamanians and Valentine’s Day
I want you to take a deep breath. Take a deep breath and think before you say anything. This rant is more of a worldwide scale, but Panamanians fall prey to these shortcomings so I’ll keep the focus on my fellow man; having said that, it’s pretty safe to say that a lot of what I’m about to touch on can be applied to your own society, no matter where you are. Take a deep breath. Are you well? Are you rested? Alright then, let’s begin.
Valentine’s day, to me, is a farce. The “celebration” began thousands of years ago back in the days where sacrificing one’s self for other was worth a damn and, even though there are many theories, I don’t necessarily believe they’re worth noting at this moment: truth of the matter is that since then, the holiday has become nothing but the bastard child of a consumer-fueled economic construct dressed up with a eutopic image of love for your fellow person. Let me break this one down for you: So, you’re got a special someone hidden in some corner of your heart somewhere and Valentine’s is coming up… February begins and the ads start popping up on TV, the printed media and everywhere you look there’s something that’s “perfect for the one you love.” Of course, this is all hogwash and nothing more than an excuse to sell products that are colored red. Valentine’s day is the top holiday people use in order to buy greeting cards and chocolates, as well as roses for their loved one and that’s all well and dandy, people have the God-given right to show their affection for each other just fine but my problem with it is that the publicity, the stores, the conglomerates, the media and everything in between have made this holiday out to be more of an obligation to show your affection and not some natural spark to go out and do something nice for someone else… and while we’re on that topic, why would I need a February 14th to tell someone I love them when I have 364 other days to do so? I don’t agree with people waiting for this day to do all of the corny romantic shit people do during Valentine’s when they can very well do it any other day of the year… and it’s because the norm so much that you wouldn’t have it any other way because of cultural influence. Cultural influence, the same one which would have me organize a zombie walk in October instead of august because no one would show up and do it unless it’s on the damn holiday (mind you, I also believe Halloween is another consumer-fueled holiday where people can let themselves go and be whoever they can’t be for the rest of the year. And if you tell me that Valentine’s has the same principle as Halloween then you should think about that… I’d shed a tear if I were you) is the same once that pushes people into giving Hallmark cards and buying stuff no one really needs to each other. Do you seriously think that the founding fathers of the Valentine’s festivities were thinking that they’d have to die so we would take our spouses, flings or whatever to romantic dinners and whisper into each others ears, pretending like we’re all in some kind of movie world where white pigeons fly in on cue and there’s a carriage ride home where you’ll carry her into the room and make sweet love to her while the ghost of Barry White sings at you from the the foot of the bed? Ahh, let’s see here:
Saint Valentine’s Day or Valentine’s Day is on February 14. It is the traditional day on which lovers express their love for each other; sending Valentine’s cards, candy, or donations to charities, often anonymously. It is very common to present flowers on Valentine’s Day. The holiday is named after two men, both Christian martyrs named Valentine. The day became associated with romantic love in the High Middle Ages, when the tradition of courtly love flourished.
The day is most closely associated with the mutual exchange of love notes in the form of “valentines”. Modern Valentine symbols include the heart-shaped outline and the figure of the winged Cupid. Since the 19th century, handwritten notes have largely given way to mass-produced greeting cards. The Greeting Card Association estimates that approximately one billion valentines are sent each year worldwide, making the day the second largest card-sending holiday of the year behind Christmas. The association estimates that women purchase approximately 85 percent of all valentines.
In the United States, the marketing of Valentine’s Day has tagged it as a “Hallmark holiday“.
Let’s take a trip down memory lane: back in the days of the Roman Empire, February 14th was the day they took to honor Juno, the goddess of women and marriage; this would subsequently kick-start the Feast of Lupercalia the following day. Anyway, in what can only be considered the first instance of the “blind date,” on the eve of the festival the men would draw a name out of a jar filled with the names of the girls in the community or whatever and whoever you, as a guy, would draw you’d have to hang out with her for the duration of the festival. Since gender segregation was all the rage during those times (which would explain the wild orgies), there were many cases where you’d meet the girl you drew out of the jar that very same night. More often than not these couples would go so far as to marry eventually (after giving themselves some time to know each other, of course… getting married without really knowing your partner? Thank Marley stupid behavior doesn’t happen nowadays! HA! Am I right? Right…?).
So, while all of this pairing-up was going on, Emperor Claudius II of Rome would embark in long, bloody campaigns in order to expand the empire and crush the Christian movement. Since the guy wasn’t so popular in relation to the death that preceded him, he was having trouble having men enlist to his army because it usually meant a prompt demise. Shouting a defying “I’ll do whatever I want” to all that would listen, after using his keen detective skills to come to the conclusion that the reason why nobody signed up to his army was because they didn’t want to leave their loved ones he decided to cancel all marriages and engagements throughout the land of Rome, going so far as to ban the very mention of it.
Enter Saint Valentine, a priest that lived during the time of Emperor Claudius’ rule. Along with colleague Saint Marius not only would they hell Christian martyrs but they would also marry couples in secret… this went on for some time until the emperor found out and, in a fit of somewhat overreacted proportions had him cuffed and dragged all the way to the Prefect of Rome, where he was sentenced to receiving the worst (and last) beating of his life only to have his head cut off clean afterwards. Saint Valentine died in Rome on February 14th, 270 AD (approx.) and it sealed the deal for the holiday from that day forward. This Valentine, a true saint, sacrificed his own life for the sake of making other people happy; nowadays, all the real “sacrifice” we see is the one it takes people to shell out cash in order to keep their significant other’s happy. If you want further proof of the bastardization of the holiday then look no further than to the adorable Japanese:
Thanks to a concentrated marketing effort, Valentine’s Day has emerged in Japan and Korea as a day on which women, and less commonly men, give candy, chocolate or flowers to people they like. This has become an obligation for many women. Those who work in offices end up giving chocolates to all their male co-workers, sometimes at significant personal expense. This chocolate is known as giri-choko, in Japan, from the words giri (“obligation”) and choko, a common short version of chokorēto, meaning “chocolate”. This contrasts with honmei-choko, which is given to a person someone loves or has a strong relationship with. Friends, especially girls, exchange chocolate that is referred to as tomo-choko; tomo means “friend” in Japanese.
By a further marketing effort, a reciprocal day called White Day has emerged. On March 14, men are expected to return the favor to those who gave them chocolates on Valentine’s Day. Many men, however, give only to their girlfriends. Originally, the return gift was supposed to be white chocolate or marshmallows; hence “White Day”. However, men have taken the name to a different meaning and lingerie has become a common gift.
Would you imagine if you had to buy chocolates for every member of the opposite sex in your office floor? That’s what Valentine’s has brought upon us. Now, before I explain why I have such a disdain for this date I’d like to talk a little bit about a “social experiment” Yamile and I cooked up, called “Cupido Must Die!” Simple enough, we both agree that the holiday is bullshit so we decided to make the site up as a sign of protest: she cooked up the layout and buttons, and I wrote the manifesto. We sent the site over to a few friends over the course of the first weekend in February since we “launched” the site on Feb 3rd, and I let the thing run its course, saying I’d check the stats page after 7 days to see how it clawed its way through the blogosphere. Little did I know that not only a whole crapload of blogs would post the button and join the protest, but things went thermal considering we didn’t move a finger to promote this and well, as of today the site has over 5,000 unique visitors (these are ballpark figures as none of these things are ever entirely accurate) and over 60 sites have a button posted in their blog/myspace. Considering the site is a small Panama-centric operation, this thing is pretty incredible. Asking around as to why this happened in a community that’s pretty trendy and would rather embrace the holiday and not condone it like we have, the zeitgeist is that the nature of the holiday is what puts so many people on edge in regards to whether someone should celebrate Valentine’s or not… and that, my friends, is what separates February 14th to December 25th and your country’s independence day.
A lot of people have asked me why I discriminate by attacking Valentine’s solely, when Christmas is just as consumer-ready as the former as well as our November holidays. It’s true: November is all about who has the biggest flag or the most decorations, and street vendors have a field day at the expense of people’s patriotism… and let’s not even get into Christmas, which started out as the birthday of a religion’s messiah to getting a pine tree inside your house and put presents under it. Saint Nick? Santa Claus is the equivalent of a marketing firm gone wild, it’s current incarnation brought forth by Coca Cola, children. Are you noticing the pattern? A bunch of holy men who did very incredible things back in the days of yore have been bastardized in order to fit a consumerist construct. Hell, I’ll be the first to admit right now that I’m a consumer whore; I’m the type that thinks that money should be there to spend it, and if buying shit I don’t need makes me feel good then so be it… we’re all guilty of it. Do you own makeup? Guilty. Ever bought a killer stereo system for your car? Guilty. Do you buy self-help books? Abso-fucking-lutely guilty. Ever bought the Ultimate Special Edition of your favorite movie? Yup, you’re guilty. Star Wars? Fucking mierda, I’m not even gonna continue because you’re so guilty. Still, the different between all other holidays and Valentine’s, and the reason why this is such a hot topic for people is because of the focus… that of love. The whole marketing approach is geared towards people who are in a relationship with someone and it cause grief on both sides of the fence: a commercial goes on saying you should buy your loved one a t-shirt, and those people in relationships are (usually) so accustomed to having something given to them for the holiday that the mere thought of not partaking in the practice has been the source of many break-ups. Some people get so freaked out at the thought of someone not participating that they try to rationalize it by saying that the only reason they don’t celebrate Valentine’s day is because they don’t have anyone to give anything to. Uh huh, yes, now we go to the other side where all of those lonely rat bastards see the same t-shirt ad and, upon realizing they’re alone for the holiday, feel bad about themselves. So bad, in fact, that they feel resentment towards people who are in a relationship while at the same time those individuals with people to “love” secretly wish they were alone. Oh, the irony! Both of these people lose the real meaning of what St. Valentine’s should be, which is to love your fellow man. You’ll never see this type of discrepancy in any other holiday because none other hits so close to home, whether we bring ourselves to acknowledge it or not.
Panama’s way of celebrating Valentine’s is the same as it is in any other country in the globe since, like Christmas, the feeling that powers it is universal. Either way, street vendors stock up on their red (and blue, and black) roses and sell them early on, as far back at Feb. 12 in order to rake in some dough before the holiday is even here. Many mariachi bands find bigger business around this time (second only to Mother’s Day) as my Mariachi neighbor has talked to me about before, and as do the usual venues that couples go to like movie theaters and restaurants. In that way, Panama is no different than the other important countries in our hemisphere since every singe kind of business is in on the Valentine’s bandwagon, right down to the push button motels.
There will always be two sides of the fence: those who like the holiday and those who don’t. I suppose I’m in the camp that doesn’t, but I beg to clarify that I agree with the initial sentiment, just not its current incarnation. My advice to you, dear reader, is to try and spend this holiday with your loved ones and spend the least amount of money possible; it shouldn’t be about the presents, but what we feel for each other. What you should be doing though is ask yourself one fundamental question: why do I have to wait for Valentine’s day to tell people I love them when I have the other 364 days to do so? That’s why the holiday would be nothing more than a regular day for me.
This year it isn’t just a regular day, though. As part of the “Cupido Must Die!” Initiative, Porto Diaohas mobilized into doing a very discrete gathering in order to protest. Don’t expect any urban warfare to go down; we’re just gonna get together with some guitars, play some songs are pretty much just hang out with our peers, people who we appreciate and respect. Also, if anyone is curious enough, they’re welcome to drop by and hang out… the whole purpose of this impromptu gig is that we don’t need to spend a dime to appreciate each other and much less meet strangers. Yamile might take pictures, Butter might film it and Gonzo will probably knock it out of the park as usual. We’ll be at the park in Via Argentina at around 8PM if nothing wrong happens so if you see a rowdy crowd around there then you know it’s us.
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