My buddy Matt and the fine folks over at ThePanamaReport.com hit me up so that I would write an article for them regarding sex in Panama, in light of the popularity of the Push Buttons article I have floating around here so, since I hate to disappoint, I crafted an article on the subject with what I feel are much broader strokes in regards to what I cover, yet what I’ve heard is the piece is regarded as “hilarious and biblical.” High praise, and I thank them for taking a fancy towards it since I wrote it with tongue firmly in cheek. I’m glad they liked it, and I hope you get a kick out of it, too. The article is too explicit for its own good and I go into extensive detail in topic such as call girls, push buttons, prostitutes, massage parlors, strip clubs and the goings-on of all of them. I talk rates and procedures as well, so you’ve been warned. I feel it’s very informative if you’re into this sort of thing, and after reading the article once it was published I thought two things:

1. I have a hilarious potty mouth
2. For someone who doesn’t even go to strip clubs/massage parlors, I sure know a fucking lot about them.

I thought that was funny. Anyway, you can read the spiffy Panama Report article written by yours truly by clicking here, and I really hope this is the first of many musings since I had a blast writing it. I have some pending work to do, so I’ll leave you be for now; please enjoy Coheed and Cambria’s “Time Consumer,” which is the part of the CO & CA story where the titular characters murder their youngest children in order to save their world. Really, you should get into the story… it’s ridiculously addictive. It’s one of my favorite songs in the Coheed cannon not because of the part of the story in particular but because of the section of the piece that starts at 3:15 into the song and ends at 3:51. I don’t know why, but I find it brilliant and perfect. Time consumer, time consuming, consume me. Enjoy your weekend!

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