Since both Porto Diao and myself peruse Facebook daily for both pertinent and extracurricular activities, I get a lot of invites to events of all shapes, sizes and topics. As great a tool as the social networking site is, sometimes it can become quite overwhelming and douched in its own particular brand of bullshit that, cool picture albums aside, can be quite useless. Every now and then I receive little gems of wisdom though, stuff that people are doing that I would otherwise never hear about. Porto Diao still suffers through that sort of thing, so I always try to read up and investigate as much as I can about these activities and maybe, just maybe, see how I can get involved. The latest in my findings, then, is the recently-established Panama Flag League.

Founded in December 2005, the Panama Flag League’s purpose is to promote and encourage flag football in Panama. In case you’re as clueless as I was in regards to what flag football actually is and how it’s played, the lowdown goes somewhat like this: the sport is commonly practiced by retired NFL players and is played using the same rules used in the pro league, with the following exceptions:

• 8 players in offense, 8 players in defense
• The playing field is reduced to 80 yards
• In order to get First Down you need to go over 10 yards from yard 10 onward

The reason why it’s called “flag” football is that in order to avoid causing any broken hips to their mangled, raisin bodies, the vets decided that a good way so simulate the tackle’s role in the game would be to wear flags on their hips; instead of making your opponents eat dirt, you just have to pull their flag and the play is over. Violence canceled, as well as any chances of the sport getting picked up for TV. As it’s probably obvious for the casual reader, flag football is relatively new to Panama, surely introduced by the American forces while they were here (in the age of the Internet and the way information is so easily acquired these days though, I wouldn’t be surprised if this wasn’t the case), yet research indicated that the current, more organized incarnation of the sport was introduced to the female students of the Universidad Tecnologica de Panama (Panama Technologic University, or UTP) by Juan Miguel Caballero (current head coach of the Cyclons) and Prof. Victor Poveda since 2001. Mostly played by freshman women at its start, thanks to Prof. Ismael Ortega and the Bienestar Estudiantil association they got organized and made an official league with the help of the City of Knowledge, resulting in what we now know as the Panama Flag League.

The league is officially recognized by the International Flag Football Federation (IFFF) and its founder, Jim Zimolka. As of the 2007-2008 season the league has 12 teams and 250 players from all over the country, with sponsorships from companies such as Johnnie Walker, Dunkin’ Donuts, Copa Airlines, New Balance and more. Their website is updated regularly and very informative; they even have a page for those curious folks that want their flag football team to the league. Everything’s in Spanish, however; that is why I�ve taken the liberty to translate the costs breakdown for you.

Each team must pay a seasonal fee of $400 per team, totaling $4,800. the breakdown is as follows:

• Referees - $2,800. $60 per each of the total 48 games played. This number includes all divisional, semifinals, final and all-star games.
• Playing field and light utility fees - $400. The Kiwanis club owns/manages the playing fields used to play flag football (at the City of Knowledge) and they charge $25 per hour, for 2 hours. The fee also covers labeling of the field every Tuesday (Thursdays as well, if it rains) for an 8 week period.
• Trophies - $200. These cover the costs of trophies for the champion, sub-champion, offensive and defensive player of the year.
• Port-a-Field system and further field labeling fees - $600 and $100, respectively. The reason why they charge more labeling fees is that their season begins in October and ends the first few weeks of January, meaning they play during the rainiest months of the year. Paint on grass wears off with water, you know.
• PFL webpage - $285.49. The cost covers design and maintenance. This is pretty vital, as the only way a regular Joe can find out about the scores is through their online schedule.
• Flags and pigskin - $150 (including manufacturing/shipping costs). 4 sets of flags (a dozen per set), with special reinforced Velcro. Ahh, that magical wonder from the 80�s.
• Clean-up costs - $40. Basically trash cans. Huge fucking trash cans.
• Contingency funds if the proverbial shit hits the proverbial fan - $144.51

This info is available on the site, if you’d like to verify. As I mentioned earlier, each PFL season lasts 9 weeks, and runs from October all the way to the New Year, during the first week of January. Rest assured that you’ll have awesome flag action every Tuesday night (at 7PM) and Saturday afternoon (starting at 2PM) every week, with Thursdays as a backup day in case of rain canceling any games. The website really is informative, with live stats and updated scores every week. You can also read the official rules (in English) if you’re still a little perplexed about the whole ordeal. Channeling my inner Batman and doing further detective work, I was amazed to find that the PFL actually has a news section on ESPN.com, which serves the same purpose as the official site, but with infinitely more cache. You can check out the weekly scores over there by simply searching for Panama Flag League on their search engine; how do you like them apples?

I think it’s important that in a country where soccer is infinitely more predominant than its American counterpart (and with good reason, because soccer is a beautiful game), people get their stuff together and push forward initiatives like this. The PFL is extremely well organized, and in its second year as a bona fide institution they’ve quickly raised up to the mainstream scope, at least enough for Juan Q. Public to take notice and maybe want to find out how participate. The same cannot be said about the Panama Football League, which has been alive and kicking for considerably longer yet I’ll be a tick on a monkey’s ball sack if I could ever find out exactly when during the year their season takes place. To humor myself (and because I like to torture myself), I asked Google is he knew about the Panama Football League and all he could tell me is that The Panama News is on the loop of things, but the last news I could pull out of the online mag’s back issues is back in March. Also, there’s a Yahoo group that’s gone to bed alone and lonely for the better part of a year as of this writing, with no word from any league member. Wow, that Panama Football League is a douchebag, Yahoo.

A quick survey with the Porto Diao gang and some other fine folks from my MSN messenger list revealed that they too know fuck-all about what’s happening with the Panama Football League. This leads me to believe that the joy of football is segregated to zonians and their next of kin, yet another of the infinitely vast sea of “clicks” Panama is so notorious for. The zonian areas are very far away though, so it’s not like I drive around Balboa Stadium (where the games take place) regularly. Of course, I love to be proved wrong, and I hope I am because the few times I’ve gone to football games (mostly because I was/wanted to go out with cheerleaders or a combination of boredom and luck) I’ve always had a blast. Now, and remember this, dear reader, not one of these football league games will ever compare to the unique experience of watching a Panamanian team soccer game. It’s so fun, it’s infectious. The enjoyment factor is not as divisive as, say, baseball, which I find infinitely boring on TV as opposed to going to the stadium, where it’s more about the crowd than the actual game. Going to ball games is a warped experience indeed, but with soccer you take an already beautiful game and watch it live, maximizing the stakes because it’s always great to see your team hand over its opponent its own ass.

Be sure to check out the Panama Flag league website to check the latest scores, stats and news. The new wave of Panamanians is looking for new, different things to do and it’s initiatives like this one that really make a difference.

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